About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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