what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I don't deserve a penis
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
