I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
