I bet he comes in French.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
