summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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