she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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