oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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