In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
