college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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