There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I AM VODKA MAN
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
you never un-have a 4some
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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