How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
