Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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