Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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