I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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