If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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