so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
