they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
organizing the empties. That sober.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
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