Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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