He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
