I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
