you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
