Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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