Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize