We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize