how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
