before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
So much Jack, so little girl.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize
