whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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