also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
