How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
