Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Randomize
