just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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