We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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