i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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