Dual....:-)
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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