ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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