like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
