Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
