Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Houston, we have a blender
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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