How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
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