I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
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Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
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it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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