Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
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