I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize