Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
