I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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