He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
It's just like the Real World with babies
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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