thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
