He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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