Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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