Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
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