i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
