bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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